How is to choose between love and a career?

Reality., Relationship
Good morning everyone. It’s a beautiful Saturday and aside from regular Saturday house chores, hope you intend having a wonderful day today or would be like me that they would be spending the day indoors except a miracle happens.

This January is almost coming to an end and am happy because I have been meeting amazing bloggers. Well not physical meeting more of getting to follow new amazing bloggers. I also decided that aside from my regular write ups, I would be sharing posts from amazing bloggers so we can all learn together.

Below is a post I read and I found so interesting so I decided to share. I hope you enjoy it as I did.


Envy is a follower of jealousy. When you feel stung by jealousy, next side effect is envy. You have something that other’s don’t have and now they will stab you in the back. If you think that your beloved man is jealous only of other men in your life, you are very wrong.

Imagine that you live with a man who is without a job. It can happen to everyone, but that situation could be long-lasting or even permanent. So you will earn money for you, your husband and your children. It would be natural that husband feeds his family, but in some families, women are bosses, because they work, and men are at home. Fatima lives in Bosnia and she works as a teacher. She lives with unemployed husband and three adult sons. They are all lazy and they sleep all day because at night they watch movies and play games at computers. Her husband Alvin had some short time jobs, usually, he was painting walls and selling potato from their garden, but all this makes him tired. Fatima started to earn with tarot, to solve their financial problems. She is a wise woman, but Alvin has a different perception of her. He became jealous. He said to her that she should not visit her parents, who live in another country. He was very determined in his decision, so Fatima accepted this and she did not come even to her mother’s funeral. Slowly, she broke relation with all her friends, because her husband demanded this. Now she is in retirement and very ill, so she felt that she did huge mistake in her life.
Jealousy is not only bad act of a person who loves you madly. This is the product of ego and insecurity. Some men are so old-fashioned that they can’t stand superiority of their female partners.

You will think, he loves you, how can he be jealous of your success?
This is possible, and signs are next:
He doesn’t want that you finish your studying at college because he thinks your place is at home.
He doesn’t want that you accept a promotion at work, even you would earn more.
He can’t accept the fact that bosses chose your wife for important and responsible work, that they did not choose him, even he is a man.
He talks about you as you are his rival or competition.
He starts to underestimate you. You can’t drive better because you are a woman. You can’t work successfully because you are a woman.
His view is old fashioned and he thinks that women should never work in higher positions.
If your partner can’t support you, who can?
Your happiness has a direct influence on your relationship. Would you be happy that your husband gives you money every day, in small amounts, accord his wishes? Would you be happy that your main aim in life is the role of housewife, and that all you can do is cleaning, washing laundry or ironing?
Ambitions could be obstacles when your man is envious, traditional or jealous. This kind of jealousy can go so far that he will give you choice between you or your work.
If he is already your ex, you can also expect battlefield.
Robert and Constance were in relation to two years. He was working as a manual worker, in the warehouse. She was writer, but she could not find a publisher to sell her book. So she was working in the library, and selling books. One day she met a man who offered her to write columns in local newspapers, and she accepted his terms. It was no big chance for success, but Constance was happy. She became very popular and soon she found a publisher. Robert was green with envy. He did not support her, he felt an animal spot in her life, especially when his boss said to him that he will not get next salary on time. He was a loser, and their relation broke because Constance could not handle his doubts and jealousy.
Who is better and who will win? That questions should never exist in one relation. Your husband is your supporter, not your rival neither your enemy.

Source: How is to choose between love and a career?

Please do well to click on the link to see more post from the above blogger. And don’t forget to like and follow my blog.

It’s all about you. Never forget that.

You are a perfect person with a beautiful smile

Reality., Relationship

Good morning everyone. Today I found and read this poem that was posted by one of the bloggers I follow and I decided to share.

It just shows the little contradictions we face in our lives especially when it comes to relationship. I hope you enjoy and understand it just like I did. The meaning is deeper than the words you see. Click on the source to read the full write up.

Aren’t you bored just to shine always? As I write this to you, you will never get to read these words out. I just want to say. I miss you so very much but yet I don’t love you. Still, I don’…

Sourcevia You are a perfect person with a beautiful smile

It’s all about you……. Never forget that.



Good morning everyone. For awhile I have been busy. But I decided to dabble a little into something that is currently happening in our country. People might call it politics but I call it our reality. I remember the first time I wrote an article about my view on a particular government in power when I was in secondary school, my government teacher discouraged me from publishing or writing such. For “your safety” she said.

But today I decided to write but this time, in a poem format. I just hope this poem speaks to us and helps us prepare for a better 2019. It’s our country Nigeria and we have the right to make it better.


I have sat for so long in silence
Wondering if no one will speak
We are silent; yes we have always been silent
Will no one speak?

Our silence has been taken for stupidity
They come out at that time of the year
With their fake promises
We would put air conditions in the air
And fight corruption till the end

Corruption they say?
But who is more corrupt than them?
He is working people say
But yet we see nothing
Remind me exactly what he is doing because I must have amnesia.

They say you dare not speak
You speak, you die
They put fear in our minds
As they rob us of our oil.

Before they say, go to school
It’s only through education you can make it
Now the song has changed
It has become, go into farming
But what facilities have you made available?

No jobs for the youths
Yet their unborn grandchildren, already receive salaries
You don’t pay your workers salaries,
Yet you find pleasure in erecting statues
Why are you then a leader?

They gather round and talk of how our money will be spent
Yet we see nothing it was spent on
You talk of empowering the youth
Yet you give them wheel barrows as gifts
Oh! Is that what you meant as empowerment?

See how their blood flows
Down to their own very river
The blood of the innocents
River Benue, the river of its people

We mourn for our lost brothers
We pray for their souls
But not as much as we mourn for our country
We are gradually turning this land of oil
To the land that flows of blood

Oh Nigeria! Nigeria my country
Is this what you have turned to?
No one sings praises of you again
Everyone is looking for away to break up with you
We are all looking for a white man who can give us everything.

They take our silence for stupidity
They call us the most patient people in the world
A compliment but yet an insult
I fear for our feature
Yes! Our future I fear.

Today I beat the drum to proclaim the truth
Hear ye! and hear it loud and clear
Claim not that you didn’t hear
For the drum of Conga will speak loud and clear.

Please don’t forget to like and share the post so that it can get to so many Nigerians out there…… God bless Nigeria 🇳🇬.

Does she know your plans?

Inspirational, Reality., Relationship

Dear aunty, I want you to write this down somewhere and never forget. Failure is not an option, and assumption is also an error.

I invited a loving friend of mine to church and he came along with his beautiful girlfriend Melvis. Somewhere between the sermon Pastor made an open call for anyone believing God for marriage this year to come out for prayers, hmmm, come and see bachelors and bachelorettes running to the altar to receive 2018 marriage blessing.

Me? I was just chilling in my chair, that one is not my consign. 😂😂😂

As my friend and i were gossiping to ourselves about the large number of ladies running to the altar, his girlfriend got up and walked to the altar, arhhh, okay, our gossip disappeared, and we just kept silent, it was like somebody poured ice water on his brain, he just remained calm.

After a few seconds my big mouth couldn’t hold it in, so i asked him “James, did you have a fight with your girl?” He said No.

“Are you guys having issues? He said no.

Then why are you sitting here when she’s outside with marriage people, why are you not stepping out to join her in agreement of faith?

He said because he doesn’t have marriage in his plans for this year, so he cannot go out to claim a blessing he is not ready for.

“Okay, but does Marvis know about that?”
He said no.

“Oh, that means you guys have never discussed marriage and future plans before?”

He said they have, but not deeply about marriage, just things about the present.

You see, I can’t stay in a relationship where i cannot look into the future and see myself standing by the altar in a black suit waiting for you in a white dress. I know that not all relationships end that way, but if i cannot picture you in the future I am building for myself, then there is absolutely no need investing my time, or wasting yours.

Dear aunty Marvis,
Alot of you are still hanging on to campaign promises, holding on to all the plans you made 3years ago when the relationship was still fresh, naaa, you need to learn how to set new goals every year. Do you know where your relationship is heading? Have you sat down to talk about 2018 with your man? Or you’re still assuming that all the things he said last year still applies to this year.

Call him up and ask him nicely;

“Baby what plans are we making this year? I would like to know so that I can be praying about them with you”

Find a way to talk about this darling, you might just be there thinking this year is the year, when the young man has plans of pursuing his masters first or going abroad before settling down. Don’t love on assumption, don’t step out to that altar believing he will step out with you, that was what Marvis assumed, but little did she know that the plans have changed.

Find a nice way to ask him, the year is still early to find out how you will be investing your time, energy and resource.

“oh he might think I’m desperate for asking”…
No, that is not desperation, you deserve to know if the goal is the same or if the plans have changed. Because he showered you with gifts last Christmas doesn’t mean the plan is the same, what he said last year doesn’t apply this year, ask him to confess them to you again to be show the focus is the same and feelings has not changed, it is your life. Don’t be the only one stepping out like Marvis, don’t be the only one praying for something the other person is not ready for, those prayers are only effective when two agree.

I hope you caught this very tight?
#confessuonsofagoodman #allisonhyacintho

Copied from – Allison Hyacintho.

If you don’t know him, you need to check him out on Facebook and I promise you would learn a lot from him. He is a great counselor.


Reality., Travel

Happy new year to everyone especially faithful readers of more to life…. Am sorry it took me twelve days to say my happy new year… I must say I was overwhelmed by the holiday that I became lazy to blog.. But am back to work and the holiday is over. We are all back to reality.. My prayer this year is that this year would be a better, fruitful and more successful year. Amen. For awhile I was tempted to ask what your new year resolution were but right now, I don’t think it’s necessary maybe because of what I read on my favorite radio show Facebook page Jela’s clinic.. “New year only exist in our minds. It does not exist. It’s simply a day after another day and it is a reason new resolutions fails. When we discipline ourselves, we have a new year everyday”…. by Benjamin Atomode II.

So I know a lot of people were waiting for my update on the remaining two days experience in calabar. Am so sorry I couldn’t post it. But I am going to give a very brief break down.

28th December 2017 It was in calabar I realized I had the calling of walking…. I did a lot of walking from one point to another and thank God to an extent I am petite so I could squeeze myself in and out the midst of people just to get a view of the dancers at every point. It was funny seeing a lot of people not minding standing on bill boards, statue of Mary Slessor, cars and even sitting on gates of houses along the road.

The above pictures were taken earlier in the day before the main show.. The truth is, I was so exhausted and tired of standing and walking that I left around past 7pm. A friend called me later that day to let me know that I had missed the main show. According to him, the main show started around 10pm and ended about 4-5am in the morning…. Well I guess I missed it but if I had stayed any longer, I probably would have collapsed.

29th December 2017 On this day, I didn’t even step out.. I came down with a little fever. I think it was the stress of the previous days. I was so angry that I missed one of the main days I was anticipating. Which was the day different artists had to perform live on stage… Well all in all, I had a wonderful holiday in calabar. An experience I wouldn’t exchange for anything.#Calabarcarnival2017#

More to life officially welcomes you to 2018. A better and bigger year for us all… This year, we are going to dabble into so many things that’s the more reason we need to make the blog better by redesigning first and adding other exciting features…. Please suggestions and opinions on how to make the blog better are welcomed..

Don’t forget Abazuom Precious is still trying to get use to blogging and is willing to learn in other to get bigger, larger audience.. We are in this together……..


Reality., Travel, Uncategorized

It’s been fun all the way in calabar. I haven’t been able to share my experience and reviews concerning the carnival and places I visited, but today I would share two days experience at once…

26th December (boxing day).

Cultural carnival took place but I really didn’t observe it because I wanted to visit the famous Marina Resort. I went to watch accidental spy a Nigerian movie produced by one of Nigeria popular comedian named AY. The movie was very nice and thumps up to AY again for this one. This movie has been out for awhile although I couldn’t find the time to go and watch it. So if you are like me, find the time to entertain yourself with this movie.

My review about Marina Resort.

Marina Resort is supposed to be a very nice place. Well to an extent it was. I like the fact they had a boat ride which I have never been on and hope to do so before I leave calabar.

Film house is the cinema located in the Resort. Well, out of all the movies showing nation wide by film house, calabar was only showing 3 which I find disappointing to an extent.. I really wanted to watch Wedding party 2..

Another bad was the restroom of the cinema. It was so bad that it made the whole place smell especially the Screen 3 where I was watching my movie.. The same for the restroom outside. There was no water. Personally I think the manager needs to look into this.

On my way home from the resort, I walked to a place called De Choice eatery located at Marian . The place was lite. Hero (a brand of beer), was hosting a show in the premises. I gave myself a treat of Kpomo nkwobi.

It was so nice and perperish I enjoyed every bit of it. I don’t take alcohol so I enjoyed it with my cold bottle water.

Amazing performances by up coming artists, dancers and very funny Mc.

This place ended my day with fun.. It was fun all the way..

27th December (bikers festival)

My outfit for the day….. Through out my stay in Calabar, it’s going to be either sandals or snickers for easy movement…

Bikers festival was awesome. I wish I can share the video but I can’t because my blog hasn’t been upgraded to that version yet but I would share pictures.

Cross river state Governor’s scorpion power bike was the best. He has diligently followed the footstep of his predecessors…. They always find a way to make sure each year supersedes the other.

It was so exciting for me witnessing this first hand….

Today (28th December) would be the dancing competitions on the street. Am already there waiting for it to begin. The fun part is you can never go hungry because things are been sold everywhere..

Try not to miss out on Calabar carnival 2018….


Reality., Uncategorized

Merry Christmas to everyone who reads More to life. I hope we are all enjoying the holidays despite the fuel scarcity and increase in price in Nigeria?

I finally came to Calabar for the carnival I have been longing for although it wasn’t easy. I promised to share my experience all the way starting from my journey.

At first I checked online in hope of booking a flight from Abuja to Calabar and the figures were scary for a Corps member like me. (NYSC: currently undergoing National youth service crops) I think the lowest was around, #42,000. I decided to check my next option which was going by road. Although I hate seating in a car for a long time, in this case I had no option. I checked a transport company called “ABC transport company” and the price was #11,500. Well was still on the high side but I had no choice. I tried purchasing my ticket just to find out the bus was already fully booked .. What a disappointment.

I was almost loosing hope until I decided to join my parents to Anambra state and then take another vehicle to Calabar the next day… It was still by road but I always loved family traveling. My dad did the driving, my mum had to keep him from feeling sleepy by making sure she was awake and keep a conversation going. We had foods and drinks so there was no need to stop. We all ate in the car except for my dad who can only eat banana and groundnut.. When I mean we, I meant my cousin, her friend, my brother’s friend and my friend. My other siblings decided Abuja was their place for holiday..

Getting to Enugu, we stopped for my dad to eat and we bought very nice “palm wine known as local wine”. It’s usually very sweet and rich. If you’re not from Nigeria, when ever you visit, try to have a taste of it especially those from the Eastern part of Nigeria.

Aside from bad roads in few states, the increase in fuel price was another issue. In some states, fuel was sold between, #220 and #250 per liter which is just too bad..

I got to Calabar on Sunday afternoon by 4.00pm having left the park around 9am…..

“Welcome to Calabar” at last i was in Calabar. It’s really been years since I was in Calabar and I had a lot in mind. Well, first thing I noticed was the long queue in a filling station.. The increase in fuel prices made transportation fare more expensive even around Calabar between short distances. The best part about my arrival was the fact I was welcomed with Garri and Afang soup (one of the local delicacy here).

Christmas Village

Yesterday been Christmas, I decided to visit the popular Christmas village located in Mariam.. Well currently am staying at a friend’s place in Etaghbor around school road two (quite and peaceful environment). On a normal day, from my location to Christmas village in Mariam cost #50 for taxi but due to fuel scarcity, drivers now charge #100. The traffic around there (Mariam road) was much that all the passengers in my vehicle had to come down and work to the Christmas village.

Christmas village was filled with people. Buyers, sellers, dancers, different disc jockeys (Dj).. Different corners where you can seat and order things to eat and drink.. Well I only took a work round and left because I couldn’t get anywhere to seat and it was too crowded and the smoke from different Suya points was disturbing me.. But for anyone who can endure such a place, I assure you that you would enjoy Christmas village but you have to go early in other to get a nice place to seat and relax..

When I left the Christmas village, I walked to a restaurant called Crunches still around Mariam road and I ate coconut rice with chicken and moi moi. I enjoyed the food but the lady attending to me had a bit of attitude but I forgave her because I was in a good mood.

I really can’t wait for the best part of the carnival. The bike rides and the show.. Will continue to share my experience of calabar and it’s carnival. I have made a list of places I would like visit while am here starting with Marina Resort..But I am very much open to suggestions.

No matter where you are, the most important thing is you should try to be happy and make good use of each given day and opportunity.

If you are in Calabar carnival, do well by letting us know.

It’s all about you… Never forget that


Inspirational, Reality.

It’s a beautiful week and it’s almost Christmas…… The most anticipated holiday of the year I guess at least for me. 

What’s your plan for Christmas? Are you traveling out of the country, or are you traveling to your village, or are you among those like my siblings that have no intention of moving an inch or are you like me that can’t wait to turn up for Calabar carnival? 

Yes you heard right! I have been to Calabar a lot in the past but I have never attended the Carnival before. Now you can tell why am so excited and happy… Am going to be sharing my experience of the carnival with everyone when I get there. 

The truth is,  it really doesn’t matter where you are or where you intend going to but what matters more is your happiness and that of your loved ones. 

Today  I decided to share a quote from Denisse Copeland and I hope it keeps your week going. 


Somethings might not have worked out last week, last month, this year like we anticipated but it doesn’t mean God didn’t love you. But it didn’t happen because he had better and greater plans for you and that’s what we should all keep in mind this week…. 

It’s all about you………Never forget that 


Health, Reality., Relationship

I know this post might be very lengthy to read but I beg that you take your time and read not forgetting to share it because you can never tell who you might be saving. 

The fact or condition of being addicted to a particular substance or activity. 

The state of being enslaved to a habit or practice or to something that is psychologically or physically habit – forming, as narcotics, to such an extent that is cessation causes severe trauma. 

A lot of us think addiction is only related to drugs and alcohol. But the truth is we have other things anyone can be addicted to. Examples are : Games, pornography, Sex, social media to mention but a few. 

Today I decided to talk about one aspect of the above mentioned types of addiction that most people don’t even realize they have while those who know, don’t think they need help. Sexual addiction is my main focus for the day. Am going to share a little research I did on it and put down the different websites as usual so you can check it out to get more information. 

What is sexual addiction? 
Sexual addiction is a condition in which an individual cannot manage their sexual behavior. Persistent sexual thoughts affect their ability to work, maintain relationships, and fulfil their daily activities.

Other terms for sexual addiction are sexual dependency, hypersexuality, and compulsive sexual behavior. It is also known as nymphomania in females and satyriasis in men.

Research also has found that sex addicts often come from dysfunctional families and are more likely than non-sex addicts to have been abused. One study found that 82 percent of sex addicts reported being sexually abused as children. Sex addicts often describe their parents as rigid, distant and uncaring. These families, including the addicts themselves, are more likely to be substance abusers. One study found that 80 percent of recovering sex addicts report some type of addiction in their families of origin.

While sexual addiction shares some features with substance addiction, the person is addicted to an activity, not a substance. Treatment may help, but without treatment, it may get worse.

Fast facts on sexual addiction Sexual addiction prevents people from managing their sexual behavior. Why it happens is unclear. It can have a severe impact on a person’s life, but key bodies, such as the American Psychological Association (APA), have not yet established it as a diagnosable condition. Typical behaviors include compulsive masturbation, persistent use of pornography, exhibitionism, voyeurism, extreme acts of lewd sex, and the failure to resist sexual impulses. Treatment centers and self-help groups can help with sexual addiction.What Are the Different Types of Sexual Addictions?There are no distinct categories, but sexual addictions can come in different forms, including addiction to: Pornography, Prostitution,Masturbation or fantasy, Sadistic or masochisticbehavior, Exhibition/Voyeurism, Other excessive sexual pursuits.Emotional Symptoms of Sex AddictionIf you or someone you love suffers from a sex addiction, you might not have healthy boundaries. If your husband is addicted to pornor sex, you may feel alienated, isolated, depressed, angry, or humiliated and need treatment yourself. If you are addicted to sex, you might become easily involved with people sexually or emotionally regardless of how well you know them, according to Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous. Because most sex addicts fear being abandoned, they might stay in relationships that aren’t healthy, or they may jump from relationship to relationship. When alone, they might feel empty or incomplete. They might also sexualize feelings like guilt, loneliness or fear.

Physical Symptoms of Sex Addiction

Although a sex addiction or pornography addiction can create many physical side effects, few physical symptoms of this disorder exist. However, the most common physical sex addict symptoms you might notice from having a sexual addiction is feeling immobilized due to sexual or emotional obsessions.

How do you know if you are an addict? 

It is best to consult with a healthcare professional for proper evaluation of your sex addiction, however, you may also want to look out for the following signs:

  • You feel powerless over how you act sexually.
  • Your sexual choices are making your life unmanageable.
  • You feel shame, embarrassment or even self-loathing over your sexual acts.
  • You promise yourself you’ll change, but fail to keep those promises.
  • You’re so preoccupied with sex it becomes like a ritual to you.

Get Help For Sex Addiction

It is important to understand that although sex and porn addiction are not “formally” diagnosable, these conditions exist and often present with very adverse consequences and high levels of distress, guilt, and emotional turmoil. If you can relate to the symptoms mentioned above, or know somebody who meets these criteria, do not hesitate to ask for help.

Some treatment options include:

  • Individual therapy – 30-60 minute sessions with a certified mental health professional, focused on your sexually compulsive behaviors and any co-occurring disorders.
  • Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy (CBT) – Focuses on the idea that our behaviors, emotions, and thoughts are all interrelated and works to change negative thoughts to positive thoughts and self-talk.
  • Psychodynamic therapy – Built around the premise that unconscious memories and conflicts affect our behavior, Psychodynamic therapy uncovers early childhood influencers of current habits or present factors that contribute to the current sex addiction.
  • Dialectical-Behavioral Therapy (DBT) – Contains four components: skills training group, individual treatment, DBT phone coaching, and consultation team and these four components are designed to teach four skills: mindfulness, distress tolerance, interpersonal effectiveness, and emotion regulation.
  • Group therapy – Led by qualified therapists, group therapy is designed to replace negative and detrimental behaviors with pro-social and positive ones. It provides the addict with assurance that he or she is not alone in his or her experiences.
  • Couple’s counseling or Marriage counseling – This can be very beneficial for the sex addict and his or her partner. Couple’s counseling can help to improve communication skills, trust, and healthy sexual functioning between partners.
  • 12-step recovery – Sex Addicts Anonymous imitates the 12-step program of Alcoholics Anonymous and is a group-based model focused on acknowledging one’s powerlessness and willingness to live a life free of addiction.
  • Inpatient therapy – There are some inpatient recovery centers designed to treat sex and porn addiction. The patient resides at the recovery facility for the duration of treatment so that he or she can focus on the healing process without the distractions and temptations of everyday life.

What Causes an Addiction to Sex?

Research has shown that there are a lot of causes of sexual addiction ranging from biological, physiological and social. Check ( for more details. I would also add sexual abuse. Sexual abuse plays an important role in the life of the abused. Most sexual abused persons either hate sex or become an addict for sex. 

I know most people find it difficult to talk about sex but sex addiction is a very silent problem “sickness” that needs to be addressed and I hope those suffering from this problem find the right people to talk to and help them find solutions. 

More to life is here to help solve our unspoken problems that no one dares to speak about. 

It’s all about you…. Never forget that. 


Cambridge English Dictionary



There are times, when things don’t seem to be working as planned or as we wish, don’t worry. There’s a reason for everything. Don’t see it as a delay. See it as God perfecting his plans for you. His ways aren’t ours and his thoughts aren’t our thoughts. 
Always know that there’s MORE TO LIFE as long as you trust God to do his “THING”. 

Have a very beautiful Monday and a wonderful week…